So we returned home from Bangalore feeling happy that we were going to make it home for the next few years, exciting.
However it was at this point things become a reality – you actually have to tell people you are leaving, let your child’s wonderful school know they are not returning in September, for me it was also Daisy’s time to start school in September – the school she’d visited most days for the past 3 years picking her big brother up and the class she already knew very well. No more cycle to school runs instead we were scoping her up and moving her to the other side of the world.
It certainly seems an amazing opportunity to begin a new life in another part of the world but it is tough too (and no doubt for our family and friends we were leaving behind).
We also had a lot of uncertainty – were we actually going to get the villa we really wanted in Bangalore? Did Woody pass his entrance exam? Was there even a school place at TISB for him? In hindsight I think we began our ‘India training’ at this point. Well used to definite answers, when you rent a house in the UK the negotiations are over very quickly and then you either pass the reference checks or not, simple! India likes a more roundabout process, it took about 4 weeks to confirm our house as apparently our prospective landlord was overseas….we eventually found out once we moved that our landlord lived overseas so really had no bearing on rental negotiations!! We found this very difficult as Robbie and I like action and quick results!!! Something we were going to have to learn to find less frustrating (although think I’m still learning this lesson).
At this point Robbie started making a lot of lists, I am categorically NOT a list maker – all those words sitting there, shouting in your face how much you actually have to sort out – lists freak me out. Robbie on the other hand finds them an oasis of calm in chaos and takes great pleasure in crossing things off – marital bliss, not! The lists also seemed to be getting longer, rent house, find new tenants for flat, inform council, inform utilities and the other million people that seem to want to know if you are leaving the UK, insurance, sell cars, get approximately 25 million passport photos of each of us blah blah…. It was never ending. The wine consumption was definitely increasing!
An interesting complexity to this situation was that as we were moving for Robbie’s work it was his company that were orchestrating the move i.e it was mainly coordinated through Robbie. Every question, request for information had to come through my husband. In our relationship I am the organiser in the household, I get holidays booked, manage our tenants, sort out utilities as Robbie hates all this. All of a sudden he had to manage this scenario with me asking constant questions as my lack of control over the situation also freaked me out massively! I think we have both learnt from this situation that I should retain my role as family organiser, it had served us well for 18 years and worked for us!